Where Everybody Knows Your Name, Interrupted

I have a favorite restaurant now. The food is passable, but there's plenty of it and I even have "my" waitress. Her name is Alex (which I learned today after asking to sit in "that girl's" section), she's a dead ringer for Anne Hathaway, and she likes black ink tattoos. She also brings me a diet coke on her way over to my table, before asking if I want the special (which I do), and rattling off my pizza topping, salad special order, and dressing selection. For $5 I get a slice of pizza with whatever topping I want, a big salad (minus the mushrooms, olives, onions, and other yucky additions), a bottomless drink, and a whole plate of buttery, cheesy breadsticks with marinara. It's far more than I can eat in one sitting, so usually I leave feeling bloated, but it's worth it. Especially because Alex doesn't think I'm lame for always coming in by myself and doing Kakuro puzzles while I eat (she even said she's bored of Sudoku and looking for something new). Of course, it helps that they donated to my silent auction, too. It takes me back to my IHOP passion/obsession when the boys and I were regulars for the late night shift, doing crosswords (or rather, they did the first half, gave up, and I finished them) and eating almost strictly appetizers.

Well, this post was going along nicely, but Fox News just ruined my evening, and I don’t remember my point, nor do I feel like writing anymore, but now that I've started I have to post something. In 40 minutes, here (in no particular order) are the stories they reported on:

--A 7-year-old was locked in a closet and starved to death by his foster parents

--A 4-year-old strangled herself in a car window when her grandma left her alone

--A college student was murdered and then her house set on fire

--A transgendered teen was beaten to death with a fire extinguisher when the man she met online found out she was born male

--A father-son team who raped a female pizza delivery driver was turned loose from jail on a technicality

--A man killed his girlfriend’s kitten to intimidate her, and when that didn’t work, decided to strangle his girlfriend instead

--A doctoral student was killed by lightning while practicing karate

--Oh, and John McCain promises to catch Osama bin Laden

I think I need to go back to my happy-place-restaurant where I can remain blissfully sheltered from the world’s evils. Like Fox News. Maybe they're all just depressed that they don't know how to mail merge...I guess it's time to get back on my soap box.